How Indian Hostel Students Can Handle Loneliness & Homesickness
“It was my first night in the hostel. I had a steel trunk full of books, some neatly packed snacks from home, and a phone full of unread messages from relatives wishing me good luck. But all I could think of was Maa’s voice echoing in my ears as she waved goodbye with teary eyes at the station. I tried to sleep, but the unfamiliar ceiling, the distant hum of fans, and the occasional sob from another room only made me feel more alone. I wasn’t just missing home, I was missing a piece of myself.”
This story isn’t unique. It belongs to thousands of Indian students stepping into hostel life for the first time, full of dreams, but carrying the weight of homesickness and loneliness.
Leaving home for the first time for a long time, especially in Indian culture where families are tightly woven together, it is more than a location shift. It’s an emotional upheaval. And while hostel life teaches major life lessons such as resilience, independence, and self-reliance, the journey can often feel isolating, especially in the initial phase.
So, if you’re a student struggling with loneliness or homesickness while in a hostel, you are not alone. This article is for you. A guide not only to survive but to emotionally thrive.
Acknowledge Your Feelings—They’re Completely Valid
In Indian households, we grow up surrounded by people like parents, siblings, cousins, grandparents, and sometimes even neighbours who feel like family. Shifting to a hostel, often in a different city or state, can suddenly feel like being dropped on a different planet.
It’s okay to miss home.
It’s okay to cry.
It’s okay to not feel okay.
Suppressing feelings only leads to more stress. Instead, acknowledge your emotions. Talk to a roommate, write in a journal, or even call someone you trust. Naming what you feel is the first step toward healing.
- Stay Connected with Home but Set Boundaries
Daily calls to home can bring comfort but can also turn to a double-edged sword. While staying connected helps ease the emotional gap, too much dependency on calls or messages can delay adjustment to the new life situations.
Find a balance:
- Set fixed times apart to talk to family (once in the morning, once at night)
- Share good things about your day, even small wins
- Let them know you miss them, but also reassure them (and yourself) that you’re learning to cope
Remember: Your goal is not to disconnect from your family, but to grow roots in your new environment while keeping home in your heart.
- Create a Familiar Environment in Your Hostel Room
When your surroundings feel unfamiliar, your brain constantly reminds you that you’re “not home.” The more personalized your space is, the more comforting it becomes.
Try this:
- Bring a soft bedsheet or pillow cover from home
- Put up photos of your family, friends, or festivals
- Keep small items from home: a keychain, a scarf, a handmade card
- Add a little lamp or scented candle (if allowed)
Making your room “yours” helps turn it into a sanctuary rather than just a sleeping space.
- Establish a Daily Routine (Even if It’s Simple)
One of the biggest contributors to loneliness is lack of structure. Without a routine, the mind wanders—and often, it wanders to what we miss.
Anchor your day with structure:
- Wake up and sleep at fixed times
- Have regular meal and study slots
- Include time for self-care, physical activity, and relaxation
- Join a group activity, hobby class, or sports team within the hostel or college
Having a routine gives you a sense of purpose and slowly replaces “empty” time with “engaged” time.
- Make the First Move in Friendships
Many students in hostels feel the same way as you—but everyone waits for someone else to make the first move. Don’t be afraid to say hello, share snacks, ask for help, or invite someone for tea.
Hostel friendships often start in small ways:
- Borrowing toothpaste or asking to share notes
- Watching a cricket match together in the common room
- Joining a midnight Maggi cooking session
- Complaining together about hostel food it’s a universal bonding ritual!
You don’t need a big friend circle. Even one or two good friends can make the hostel feel like home.
- Celebrate Small Festivals & Milestones Together
Indian culture is rich in festivals, rituals, and family gatherings. Missing those can make homesickness worse. But you can recreate that warmth—even in a hostel.
Celebrate together:
- Organize a small Diwali or Onam celebration with your hostelmates
- Cook or order special food on birthdays
- Watch family movies on weekends
- Light a diya, wear something traditional, and video call your family during festivals
Sharing your culture also invites others to share theirs—creating a beautiful blend of traditions and emotions.
- Take Care of Your Mental & Physical Health
Loneliness and homesickness aren’t just “in your head”—they impact your body, mind, and academic performance.
Here’s what helps:
- Eat regular meals, even if hostel food isn’t great (supplement with fruits/snacks)
- Sleep well—lack of rest worsens mood and anxiety
- Move your body—even a walk or light stretching releases endorphins
- Practice mental hygiene—journaling, prayer, or meditation
If your sadness becomes overwhelming, please reach out for help. Most colleges have counselors. There is no shame in seeking support.
- Find a Sense of Purpose Beyond Academics
Academics may be the reason you’re in the hostel, but they shouldn’t be your only focus. To truly feel fulfilled, find meaning outside of marks.
Explore:
- Volunteering or social work
- Campus clubs (drama, music, debate, coding)
- Reading or writing blogs
- Starting a YouTube channel or Instagram page about hostel life
- Tutoring juniors or helping peers
Purpose adds emotional depth and builds a sense of belonging.
- Accept That It’s a Process, Not a Switch
Adjustment doesn’t happen overnight. And it’s not linear. Some days you’ll feel like you’ve found your rhythm; other days you’ll miss home so much it hurts.
That’s okay. Be patient with yourself.
Remember:
- You are growing in ways you can’t yet see.
- Your parents miss you too—but they are proud of your courage.
- The pain of today will become the strength of tomorrow.
- Write Letters to Home (Yes, Actual Letters!)
There’s something deeply therapeutic about writing a letter. Unlike texting or calling, a letter lets you pour your heart out slowly. It’s also something your parents can hold on to—something tangible, filled with emotion and your handwriting.
Try it once. You might cry while writing—but you’ll also feel connected in a new, soulful way.
Being away from home is hard. Hostel life is not just about adjusting to new food or new rules—it’s about adjusting to a new version of yourself. One that is more resilient, more independent, and more emotionally aware.
You are not weak for feeling homesick.
You are not alone for feeling lonely.
You are brave for choosing to build a future even when it hurts.
Someday, you’ll look back at these hostel days with pride and nostalgia. The tears, the late-night talks, the chai sessions, the shared struggles all of it will become part of your story.
So hold on. You’re doing better than you think.